Wednesday, March 13, 2013

Being Real



This morning I was talking to a friend of mine and she told me that
she had been reading my blog and she was looking to see if I had 
mentioned anything about my Mom's recent health scare.  I told my
friend Maria that no, I had not.  I said that I was trying to keep my
blog a happy place.  Maria's response was ...
"We are all human."




She is right.  I don't like to dwell on the negative here, but there
are times when we all have to face things that are difficult.  
Life happens, and it's not always rosy.




So as much as I want this blog to be a happy place for you to 
land from time to time, I can't pretend to be upbeat when I am
feeling scared or apprehensive.  Now I could just disappear for a bit,
but to be honest, this little blog has brought me through some sad
times.  It has been a place for me to escape my worries.




It's the place I go where I have control over the content.




So there I have said it.  I have been very worried for the past week.  My Mom
has some blood clots that could prove to be fatal.  She has chosen not to go on
conventional therapy because of the risks involved.  Her attitude is that
 she has lived a good long life and she wants whatever time she has left
to be happy and not to be visiting her doctor a couple of times per week.
It is her decision and she is being very firm about it.  

Sadness and fear comes into all of our lives at times.  While I am trying my
best to be strong, I too am human.  If I have been a bit elusive,  if I have not
visited you, it's not because I don't care.  I have been trying to adjust to
a new situation that I cannot control.  I'm just doing my best to
let go and let God take control for a change.   And He well knows that
it's not always easy for me to give up the reins.

Thanks for listening.

Big Hugs,
Susan and Bentley


34 comments:

  1. Bless your heart. We all try to keep our blogs happy places but it is such a comfort to know that our readers are there for us during our down and frightening times. Thank you for sharing with us and please know that you and your mother will remain in my prayers. Love and Hugs.

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  2. Oh Susan,What a heart felt post. My thoughts are with you at this difficult time. God bless xx

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  3. We all understand your fear. When a loved one is ill it is like having the rug pulled out from under us. Life feels chaotic. I wish for this to turn around for your mom and her health to improve. Take it a day at a time. Hugs, Deb

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  4. Dear Susan,

    My heart and my prayers go out for you and your Momma. I am so sorry you are going through this. Please find peace in the love surrounding you and enjoy every single second of your Mom. Hugs.

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  5. Thank you, Susan, for always writing so beautifully, whether it is about the yard, or Bentley, or a heart wrenching situation like this. Your Mom is really brave. I do hope that her health improves. Keeping you in my prayers. xo

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  6. First of all, I am sending many prayers your way, I hope your mother gets better, you just never know. And you are brave, believe that, believe in yourself. You have to let go of the reins sometimes. As far as sharing things close to your heart on your blog, know that you will get a lot of support. We women, for the most part, have been through or going through difficult issues with our parents, family and friends. Your readers may also feel some comfort in that they can identify with you.

    Wishing you all the best, Susan, and keep us posted.

    XO,
    Jane

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  7. I fully understand where your coming from . I pray for your mum and for you . But just remember one thing , we are here for you to , as life dishes out the good and the bad and it is hard to cope at times friends from all places are here for you ! I went through a ruff patch and my blogger friends were just wonderful and helped me get through it ! ox Elaine

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  8. My best wishes to both you and your Mom. I hope your beautiful blog continues to be a haven for you.

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  9. Oh sweet precious, I am going to pray for you every single day because this is hard, it's real hard. I've been through it so I know the fear, know it well. Just know that I'm here for you anytime, and I'll be praying daily, I've put you in my prayer journal. Love you and so sorry you're having to go through this, but God will bring you through, and we'll always be here for you.

    Hugs ~ Mary

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  10. Best Statement ever...WE ARE ALL HUMAN. I find my Favorite blogs are the ones where I can LEARN FROM...not how to best decorate, DYI, magical creations
    I like to LEARN from experiences of others who are willing to share the "rawest/most open" part of themselves.
    My thoughts
    God Bless you and your mom, and thank you for sharing

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  11. It's a true thing we are all human...I have a Mom just like yours with those very words coming out of her mouth. She has a fatal lung disease she never smoked a day in her life but Dad did..but she is tired of the dr's scene and lets me know it.. she is supposed to be on oxygen 24 - 7 but decides to take it off for three and four hours which puts pressure on her heart o by the way she has congestive heart failure too...but I did tell her it was fair if I was going to worry and she not..There is definitely nothing wrong with you posting how you feel your blog friends should and will understand. Sometimes we just can't always handle everything alone!! It's best to get it out...As for God he is right there if you ask him to be...I hope you find your strength to handle this.. Leaving it his hands is the best we can do...Giant hugs from me to you..with love Janice

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  12. My heart and prayers go out to you and your mom...

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  13. My prayers are with you also. My Mom has Alzheimers. I do the same thing on my blog but truth is - life is full of challenges. After being in business 26 years - the economy is at an all time horror. I have a store in a shopping district where no one is doing well. That's not very positive - but true.

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  14. Dear Susan,
    Thank you for sharing about your real life struggle with your Mom's health. I now know how I can pray for you and your Mom. It is such a privilege lifting up my precious blogging friends. Some are dealing with chronic illness, divorce, cancer and other heartbreaking issues. Each night I spend time praying for them...and, now I can pray for you, too.
    Blessings and warm hugs,
    Carolynn xo

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  15. I understand you not wanting to share what is not happy and bright. But there is power in the prayers of the bloggers who are your friend--I pray your Mother gets better soon! Wishing you peace.

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  16. Susan I am so glad you shared this with us. I am keeping you and your Mom in my prayers. I too understand that you want your blog a happy place, I feel that way also, but realized that my blog friends are just that....friends! They care and want to know if I'm stressed or sad and it's OK to share the not so happy parts of my life also. What you are going through is so hard, letting go and letting God is the way, but it's still hard! Big Hugs, Linda

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  17. Susan, so sorry to hear about your mom. And I'm so glad you talked about it. I really feel it is theraputic and when I read others comments to someone who might be experiencing some difficulty I feel that they are so understanding and helpful. I don't know the circumstances that your mom personally is going through, but about 6 years ago, I had a blood clot in my leg, deep vein thrombosis it was called. They thought that I might lose my leg but I had a wonderful surgeon and he finally got it out but not before it damaged most of my toes on my right foot, so I eventually had to have 3 toes amputated. Dang, there went my high heels!! I am taking coumadin and it gives me such comfort that this won't happen again(So the dr. says). I have to watch certain things that I eat and I go once a month to have my blood tested but that is the only problem I have with it. I hate to see someone put off certain meds that could be helpful, but certainly respect your mom's decision and even though it's hard I guess you have to also..Hope things get better for you..Judy

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  18. Extra prayers to you both right now.

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  19. Susan I don't usually share the not so great things either, but like Sandy says there IS power in prayer and there are many powerful prayer warriors in blog land. Your mother is a strong and courageous woman. Like you I have a difficult time with things I can't control but sometimes we just have to surrender to Him, you are wise to know that. So, sending my prayers up for you all (())

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  20. Sister,
    I will pray for you and your Mom. God has a plan for us all and he will take care of your Mom.
    Much love and BIG hugs,
    Robin
    p.s. Bentley, give your Momma extra kisses today...

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  21. Susan, Wishing you and your Mother well ... and peace. Hugs to you and I'm sure Bentley will give you extra kisses.

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  22. Hugs to you dear Susan. hope things get better for you.
    ~Clara

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  23. I will add your Mom to my prayer list....God answers prayer and I wouldn't give up, sometimes things change. We serve a mighty and all wise God.
    Blessings,
    Amy Jo

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  24. Oh, Dear Susan! I'm so sorry to hear about your mother and I'm so glad you decided to share this with us so we can pray for her and for you. Praying now and sending hugs. We're here for you.
    Blessings,
    Shelia ;)

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  25. I 'm sorry for all your worries. I hope your Mom gets better soon. Sending you hugs.

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  26. Oh Susan, I am so sorry. We so love our Mother's and want them with us forever. I am glad your strong enough to honor her wishes. We are all here for you, just like you have been for us. Praying and sending a big hug...I am sure Bentley is giving you plenty of love.

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  27. Susan - After going thru long periods of suffering, Drs' visits, and medications that really alter your life with my Mom, Dad and great grandson, I can really respect your Mom's decision. There is definitely a difference in the quality and quantity of life and I don't blame her at all for the decision she has made. I know how hard it must be to accept that but I just pray that God will give you the peace that passeth all understanding and you will be there to support her 100%. And knowing you, that's exactly what you're doing now. My prayers are with you all. God bless.

    Judy

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  28. Susan you have a lovely blog and l enjoy reading your posts,l truly feel for you stay strong, God bless you. chez x

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  29. We all know that behind the pretty pictures on everyone's blog lurks a real human being, with all the trials and troubles that we all have. Being real is never wrong, in my opinion. Usually it makes me feel closer to the blogger. Glad you shared your feelings. When we have worries, it is good to have a community of female and male fellow bloggers who can share our burden. Hope all works our with your Mom and she can enjoy the last part of her life journey.

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  30. Susan ~ I respect your mother's decision. However, I will pray and continue to pray for her and for you. I pray that you will find the strength and that you and your mother will continue to bless each other and I will pray that the peace that passes all understanding with descend upon you and yours.
    I wish I could give you a great big (((Hug)))
    xo

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  31. Susan thank you for sharing it is hard i know but just know that all the people that read your blog wish you only the best but like you said sometimes life gets hard and scares us,
    i wish your mother all the best and i wanted you to know you always bring a smile to my face when i see your comments about Bentley hugs xo

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  32. Dear Susan and Bentley,
    Thank you for sharing the heartfelt information about your Mother so we can keep her in our prayers. Sending prayers and best wishes to her as well as keeping you and Bentley in my thoughts and prayers.

    Hugs and Blessings,
    Erin and Bentley

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  33. Totally understand and respect your Mother's decision. But I know it's so hard - been there. Sending hugs.

    Manuela

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  34. Susan, I am so sorry to hear about your mom. I will keep both of you in my prayers.
    Hugs,
    Laura

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Bentley and I LOVE and read every comment.

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