About five or so years ago, back while I was living in
Idaho, I was being followed for a while by a stalker.
At first it was a bit unnerving but then became more
frightening. The man who was stalking me was
mentally unbalanced. He would have conversations
with imaginary others so I knew he had some form of
mental illness, but I did not know how extensive the
illness was or how dangerous he could become if
provoked in any way.
I told my co~workers about this problem and my
stalker was being watched by security guards.
At first I didn't want to tell my husband about this
stalker because I knew David would just want to keep
me safe and locked up. Eventually I had to tell him
and David watched for the guy so that he never showed
up anywhere near our home.
After a while, my stalker started to back off and I heard that
he started stalking someone else. She became frightened as well.
The sad thing is that many take the attitude that until something
overt happens, there is not much that can be done about one
who stalks. This can have very unfortunate and dangerous
A short while after I moved away from Idaho, I learned
just how frightening ignoring a problem like stalking
can become. One day my former stalker became very
upset. This time he wasn't content to just watch and
follow, he became physically abusive to a couple of
women. He flipped out and lashed out. He was
arrested and put in jail. Although these women were
not badly hurt physically, the emotional wounds from
such an attack are very real and very lasting.
Stalking is a form of abuse. It can terrorize it's
victim and leave lasting scars. It is also
intimidating. A woman who is followed by a
larger, stronger man is very intimidated. A
million thoughts run through your mind as to how
you will defend yourself should he over power you.
The stalker knows he is exerting a power over you
and this is thrilling for him.
Never allow yourself to be intimidated by anyone.
In the case of this stalker, he was a mentally ill person.
Yet many abusers are not mentally ill but emotionally
bereft. If anyone is intimidating you or makes verbal
or written threats, know your rights. Call the police
and report the threat. Violence can and does happen
everywhere. You may be reluctant to do so, but you
are within your rights to make that call. Let's strive
to prevent violence before it is too late.
Big Texas Hugs,
Susan and Bentley